LNX has discussed his father’s reaction to learning about his sexuality, but he has not been as open about his mom. The 7 EP creator finally addressed his relationship with his mother in a new interview with Variety.

“I never really talk about my mom. She’s an addict so we don’t have the closest relationship. Even trying to get her better — things didn’t quite work out. But there’s still love,” revealed Lil Nas.

The 20-year-old Columbia recording artist also talked about the impact the death of his grandmother had on him. Apparently, he began self-medicating by heavily smoking marijuana.

“You know, drugs and murders. And my grandmother passing [in 2018]- she was the first person close to me who died. It was devastating. And it made me a hypochondriac: I’d wake up, heart racing. It was scary,” said Lil Nas. “But then I started feeling more connected with the universe, and taking everything as a sign.”